Swallowed a dictionary or what? Defenestration An unforeseen consequence of the imposition of the Window Tax in 1696. Lollygag An instruction not to eat with one’s mouth open. Flummox When new evidence throws a murder investigation into complete chaos. Cattywampus What happens at college stays at college. Bungle US Secret Service code name for POTUS.…
Working Titles… Bless This House The original working title of ‘Father Ted’ The Fresh Prince Of Bel-Air A failed attempt to keep up with the Kardashians Diff’rent Strokes A young man’s guide to puberty. Porridge How to get your oats. Only Fools And Horses Official race programme of Royal Ascot. Happy Days Nostalgia isn’t what…
They said what?…. “I have a head for business and a body for sin” Mae West “Wax on, wax off” An Edam cheese producer. “I’ll have what she’s having” A gullible follower of social ‘influencers’ “Please sir, I want some more” Mr. Creosote “You want the truth? You can’t handle the truth!” Witness for the…
Yeah, right… What is suduku? Doing mental arithmetic in the bath. What is a vagabond? A financial security not worth the paper its printed on. What is an anagram? Magrana. What is cribbage? The act of copying someone else’s homework. What is protocol? A new low. What is subterfuge? Playing classical music on an underground…
Vraiment?…… Why do we have Easter Eggs? Because of a plot for world domination involving John Cadbury, Joseph Rowntree and Milton S Hershey. What makes a Hot Cross Bun? Five minutes in the oven at Gas Mark 4. Why do we have a bunny at Easter? As a tasty alternative to the more traditional roast…
Bottom of the pops….. ‘I want to know what love is’ Millwall FC supporters club ‘Money, money, money’ The Old Ladies of Threadneedle Street ‘Tea for two’ Half of Led Zeppelin ‘There’s a kind of hush’ Dewey Decimal & The Stacks ‘Take the money and run’ Ronnie Biggs & The Robbers ‘Time after time’ Stephen…
Say what now? What is a canopy? A device for gaining access to tinned goods. What is a cookie? Fattening. What is a pup cup? A small brassiere. What is a typhoon? A hurricane with fried rice. Why are nails sharp at one end? Be glad it’s only one end: if it was both, your…
No, but seriously… What is a cannery? A can-do attitude to life. What is a rookery? An establishment that manufactures chess sets. What is hooky? Like nooky, but nowhere near as much fun. What is pinochle? A South American military dictator who can’t even spell his own name. What is a ricochet? An Irish radio…
As the saying goes… Mad as a……Reform voter. It’ll all come out in……a rash. Two’s company, three’s…..just greedy. Hi ho……Hu Every cloud has……about a thousand tons of water to rain on you. Sticks and stones……hurt. In for a penny……when going to a football match cost less than a week’s wages. Don’t count your……sheep. Not when…
Pull the other one… Borg Robotic Swedish tennis player Caught in 4K Showing off your fancy camera. Cheese pull Grilled mozzarella. Cheugy Foodstuff requiring long mastication. Chopped Foodstuff requiring very little mastication. Cheuzz Diner à deux Crash out Inevitable conclusion to long evening of student debauchery. Blue-Pilled Up all night. Fridge Cigarette Mentholated cancer stick.…
the only deadhead in the hameau 