Why, I never heard of such a thing….. What is a pup cup? A forlorn effort to house train a small canine. What is a T cup? Only available from specialist lingerie stores. What does ATM stand for? Just now, all that matters. What is a BLT? A perfectly agreeable bacon and tomato sandwich, marred…
From 2015, (yet) another rant about the importance of talking and writing proper.. Colonic Irritation Oh WordPress, you shouldn’t have got me started. A recent Daily Prompt dealt with the subject of punctuation. In particular, it asked ‘do you overuse exclamation marks? Do you avoid semicolons like the plague? What type of punctuation could you never…
“There’s a price for being free” This week’s Song Lyric Sunday has a clear nautical theme, but that’s no excuse just to roll out Rod Stewart’s ‘Sailing’ and be done with it. No apologies for featuring the Grateful Dead again, and this is another collaboration between John Barlow and Bob Weir. When played live, this…
Oh no it isn’t… ‘For whom the bell tolls’ Esmerelda ‘Knock Three Times’ Mad Ron & The Bailiffs Lyin’ Eyes Nigel Farage ‘Pink Cadillac’ Barbie ‘If You Leave Me Now’ The Goo Goo Dolls ‘Fool If You Think It’s Over’ The Undertones ‘I Close My Eyes And Count To Ten’ Albert Einstein ‘Money, Money, Money’…
From 2014, an attempt to emulate the…..er, style of noted ‘Private Eye’ columnist Mr. Comrade Dave Spart. The Alternative Voice The latest of ‘365 Days of Writing Prompts’ invites us to “write a post in the style of (or simply inspired by) a favourite author”. However, rather than lay ourselves open to charges of plagiarism (and,…
I have an abiding memory from – it must have been about 1990 or 1991 – when our daughter was having a weekend sleepover with a couple of her school friends. I came into the kitchen and there they all were, sitting around the breakfast table, planning their day and occasionally sweeping their hair back,…
Food for thought….. What is frutti di mare? Letting a horse eat an apple out of your hand. What is a rum truffle? That’s a strange one. What is a spicy wedge? Hot money. What is cock-a-leekie? The incontinence of an aging rooster. What is baked Alaska? A major consequence of global warming. What is…
From 2013, a rant about the plague of style over substance. Designers’ Trouble Has any designer of a designer hotel ever actually bothered to stay in the designer hotel they designed? The reason I ask is that Madame and I have just spent a few nights in a designer hotel in Bordeaux (it actually called…
The first Sunday of the new month, so we need lyrics from a song written and/or performed by somebody born in October. As ever, there is plenty of choice. In other circumstances I would have plumped unhesitatingly for John Lennon, but he had his (latest) turn last week with ‘Revolution’. However, it soon became clear…
Noooooo!….. What is a calibre? .45 in most Westerns. What is citrus? A seated Soviet. What is phlebotomy? An intrusive way of testing the acidity of your brain. What is pumpernickel? A means of making your money go further. What is meant by nimbus? A means of public transport with an unusually tight turning circle.…
From 2014, a case of ‘clothes maketh the man’. Not quite the fashion icon For someone who goes out of his way to disavow any interest in ‘fashion’, the subject of clothing does seem to crop up quite often, albeit randomly, in this collection of ramblings. So perhaps it’s time to give the subject its…
This week, Jim is looking for a song about any of various forms of protest. My immediate idea was Jefferson Airplane’s ‘We Can Be Together’. Looking back, however, I saw that I had already deployed it, albeit back in 2018. Sixties protest songs by Bob Dylan, or maybe Joan Baez, were obviously another potentially rich…
I got them old Fibbing Friday blues again, mama….. Why is royal blood considered blue? Because some people will believe anything. What is a blue moon? The frequency with which I get a single answer right on ‘Only Connect’. What was the song ‘Blue Is The Colour’ about? It was written as an attempt to…
From 2014: on the problems arising from being of stern demeanour… Never Knowingly Overstated Examine my sleeve as closely as you will: you’ll never find my heart on it. I’m not, by nature, particularly demonstrative. This doesn’t mean I lack feelings (far from it), simply that making a fuss – thereby, (shock horror) drawing attention to myself – doesn’t…
Oh no it isn’t… What is a logarithm? The sound generated when you hit a fallen tree with a drumstick. What is algebra? An explosion in a typesetting room. What is an algorithm? I don’t know, but it’ll probably be the death of us. What is a quantile? Someone who erroneously believes that it is…
