Are you pulling my leg? Again? What is the difference between Biweekly and a fortnight? Another two biweeklies. How much oil would your lantern need to last a fortnight? But I don’t need a lantern… If you spent a fortnight in Paris, what would you see? A big dent in your bank balance. What’s the…
From 2014, a musing on parental responsibility… No, I will NOT act my age ‘Granpa, do you miss being a kid?’ Not the sort of question you expect to come, à propos of nothing, from a seven year old tucking enthusiastically into his breakfast. Nonetheless, a fair enough one, and deserving of a measured response. ‘Well no,…
Don’t believe a word of it… What is a tandem? When you forget to put Factor 50 on the soles of your feet. What is a periwinkle? That’s private. What’s the difference between a pitcher and a ewer? Ewers don’t play baseball. Who was Penelope Pitstop? Token eye candy from Formula 1 TV coverage in…
“When faced with confrontation do you head for the hills or walk straight in? Was there ever a time you wished you’d had the opposite reaction?” This is only tangentially about confrontation (it’s only a prompt,though, isn’t it?), but today I’m going to tell you about the time I heckled Led Zeppelin. Bet that got your…
“They’re a band beyond description” When I saw that this week’s SLS prompt was about expressing appreciation for music, singing and radio, there were three obvious songs that sprang to mind: Abba’s ‘Thank You For The Music’, Barry Manilow’s ‘I Write The Songs’ and ‘Video Killed the Radio Star’ by Buggles. Perhaps too obvious though.…
Not so much fibs as truths that dare not speak their name…(I have a pathological hatred of business meetings, if you hadn’t guessed already). What is a board room? A place where you are guaranteed to be bored. Who usually has the chair? A person – almost certainly male – who has somehow got himself…
From 2013, why you should never talk to me about the ‘romance’ of travel… Go forth and worry Whoever first said that ‘travelling is better than arriving’ was probably being dragged to Tyburn to meet a masked man with a disembowelling knife and a mean streak. Or on the final approach to Heathrow in the…
The theme of telephones or, more broadly, communications has come around again for Sing Lyric Sunday this week. Of course there is a huge catalogue of songs on this topic and I’ve already harvested some of the low-hanging fruit, such as Blondie’s ‘Hanging On The Telephone’ and Chuck Berry’s ‘The Promised Land’, but it’s a…
Nahhh….. Biblioklept Someone who plagiarises the Old Testament Acnestis A pimply youth. Wrest pin A badge sported by fans of WWE. Agelast A grumpy old man. Peristeronic When only one of the speakers of your stereo system is working. Limerence Displaying a deep respect for citrus fruit. Sonder Pointing out the location of something in…
From 2014. Who would you most like to have round for dinner? The Luggage “The interview: Interview your favourite fictional character.” When I first saw this latest of WordPress’ ‘365 Days of Writing Prompts’ looming on the horizon, I must say that it sounded quite interesting. After all, in the sixty-odd summers that I’ve been shuffling…
It would be fair to say that the themes we’ve been asked to choose from for Song Lyric Sunday this week comprise an eclectic bunch. For those who might not have seen Jim’s post, here is the list in its entirety: bike, asparagus, strawberries, eggs, mental health, elderly and military. Surely, you’d think, there must…
Swallowed a dictionary or what? Defenestration An unforeseen consequence of the imposition of the Window Tax in 1696. Lollygag An instruction not to eat with one’s mouth open. Flummox When new evidence throws a murder investigation into complete chaos. Cattywampus What happens at college stays at college. Bungle US Secret Service code name for POTUS.…
From 2015, a paean to the humble chili… Hot Stuff Some people swear that “It’s impossible to eat badly in France”. Well it isn’t. It’s certainly possible to eat extremely well in France – often in the unlikeliest and unpromising places, which is part of the country’s great charm. But restaurant quality is as variable here as…
It’s the first Sunday of a new month, so this week’s task is to feature something by an artiste born in May. As ever, the choice is extensive, but I decided to focus my attention on those born on May 6th, for no other reason than that it happens to be my birthday too. Bingo.…
Working Titles… Bless This House The original working title of ‘Father Ted’ The Fresh Prince Of Bel-Air A failed attempt to keep up with the Kardashians Diff’rent Strokes A young man’s guide to puberty. Porridge How to get your oats. Only Fools And Horses Official race programme of Royal Ascot. Happy Days Nostalgia isn’t what…
the only deadhead in the hameau 