“Many a slip….” What is the difference between sun burn and sun stroke? They are different degrees of intensity – although if you stay in your tent you’ll avoid both. What is the difference between cycle and bicycle? Nothing really: it’s a matter of personal choice. What is the difference between pinch and pinchbeck? You…
What the…..? What is halitosis? The kissing disease What is an hallucination? Now you see it, now you don’t. What is hell? What is a hurricane? England captain. Plays for Bayern Munich. What is ham fisted? A pig wearing boxing gloves. What is the hokey cokey? Enforced jollity. What is hoosegow? Scottish dialect word meaning…
“Very superstitious….” Who sang “Is This A Kind Of Magic”? Lord Voldemort Who sang “Somebody’s Watching Me”? Marvin The Paranoid Android. Why do we blow out birthday candles? So we can use them again next year. Why do we associate red and green with Christmas? Because of our proud tradition of making life as difficult…
A miscellany of mensonges (that’s the French word for ‘lies’. No, really) 1] Which country has the largest number of Spanish speakers? I don’t know. Why can’t they just speak English like the rest of us? 2] Name the first computer virus WTF? 3] Name the highest paid athlete in 2023 Mohammed Salah. And if…
I wish they’d said that… “Lions, and tigers, and bears! Oh, my!” – Sir David Attenborough “Shut up – you had me at ‘hello.’” – Lionel Richie “Snakes. Why did it have to be snakes?” – A bemused diner at a Chinese banquet “I’ll have what she’s having.” – An indecisive diner at any banquet…
More misleading meanings for mundane material… Carpet That annoying nodding dog that obstructs the view through your car’s rear window. Flannel An unfinished quiche. Microwave A means of attracting the attention of an auctioneer. Timer A horse from Bangkok Coaster An actor given equal billing to yourself. Dish cloth Fabric for sharing. Bag Retrospective Irish…
Food for thought indeed this week… What is pilau rice? Boiled rice with bits in – and an unjustifiable mark-up. What are Eggs Benedict? A popular breakfast for former Bishops of Rome. What is a soufflé? An ice hockey puck with ideas above its station. What is baked Alaska? An awkward moment for climate change…
Pogging Pogoing with nothing missing. Simp As far as that meerkat in the TV commercial gets in saying his catchphrase before you throw something at the screen. Bussin Making out on the back row of the National Express coach. Delulu De most famous singer to come out of Glasgow since – oh, I don’t know:…
What is a lover’s knot? The male equivalent of a chastity belt. Where is the Milky Way? Still on the shelf. I’d much rather have a Crunchie. What is a bellyflop? An unsuccessful sumo wrestler. Why do they say ‘break a leg’ before a performer goes on stage? Because they’re the understudy and the critics…
This week, it’s more definitions… Embiggen Instruction to staff given by POTUS when he wants a larger cup of covfefe. Eargasm A very niche section of Pornhub. Erumpent Estuary English dialect word meaning harrumphing. Eldritch Ageing hippy, but comfortably off, resident of Glastonbury. Epizootic Rural activity that is actually illegal in 48 states of the…
the only deadhead in the hameau 